Cameron (interlnk) wrote,

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late night ramblings, to lj with love

Well spring is here and work has quieted down a bit, on friday night I took my first "ride" of the new season. A measly 5km run around the block at 3:30am, with a couple hard sprints, it left me completely exhausted and a bit nauseous. I can only hope that my lingering cold is as much to blame as my preceding 4 months of lethargy.. One thing about being busy with work, I move even less than usual.

On the other hand my diet is better than its ever been, and I've got nice steady work at a good rate now.. The plan is to coast through april and crank things up come May. The municipal jobs site's I'm partnered in just expanded to alberta (, which should bring a nice boost to my quarterly cheques. I'm also partnered in a blog-themed personals site ( that is struggling to gain a toehold in the crowded dating market, its 100% free and I think it has a shot at gaining something of a following, if we can just get the traffic up. The main partner on that site has quite a bit of experience in the realm of building up sites to sell off, having been around since the heady .com boom of the late 90's. The real hope is that we can garner enough attention to sell for a pretty penny, if things go really well I could see a nice payout in the area of 20k. Business and self employment is an interesting thing, the complete lack of stability is often disheartening, often exhilerating. Offers of partnership are constantly rolling in, and I've got to bat off as many as possible so as to avoid getting bogged down with work that only pays out in equity. On the other hand, slogging away for an hourly rate, no matter how high, gets kind of exhausting. No matter what the arena, hourly work is a bit of a soul-sucker.

So the world of livejournal certainyl doesn't seem to be what it once was. Signed up for the obligatory facebook account everyone needs these days, the first of the 'social networking' sites I've ben on since Six Degrees. I have to admit that facebook has done a very good job of presenting a refined communication experience, but at the same time I dont think it's gonna last, like the others before, it's bound to lose footing as the novelty wears off. I think one of the problems I have with facebook is the sort of forced social aspect of it all. I mean, theres some people that I just dont consider friends, but the raw honesty of a denied friendship request just seems a little too harsh. People take that shit personally, and I guess they should, but is dishonesty really the appropriate policy??

On the other hand, I cant say I'm bothered by the decline of livejournal.. I've always felt this thing worked better as a private log then it did a public shouting platform. I've always sort of written these posts in a format that would capture the moments for my future self. Logging the little details that will help my aging mind keep its historical timelines straight. The world of online journals has really diverged into a few diffferent kinds of people, and it seems that a big chunk of it is represented more by wannabe columnists then people who are writing to satisfy personal needs.

I've been thinking a lot about the lack of change in my personal life over the last couple years. I've always been the kind of person who spends most of my time alone, and really often find the company of others a hindrance to my desire for quiet reflection and daydreams. On the other hand, without fresh influences and new ideas even daydreams can stagnate, and I wonder if my introspection has simply become ingrown. I take the social interactions I have lightly, and its not like I dont spend enough time with friends.. I just feel like nobody is bringing new ideas to my perspective, maybe I'm just entering a jaded phase,
It's been a while since my last bout of hate for the world. I've only really met one woman I'd seriously consider dating in recent memory, and she's tied up in drama of her own. In the meantime random throws between the sheets, as pornographic as they might be in execution, dont really do anything to inspire me. I'd rather lay quietly in the cosy orange cocoon that seperates the lovers from the fuckers, or maybe thats just a trick I'm playing on myself, looking for more then I'm about to find.

There's rumblings now of a new roomate this fall, though not really confirmed yet. And a friend of mine has recently bought a condo just around the corner from me, so the potential for a new social collective is forming. There hasn't really been much happening in terms of social life regulars since the heady 424 salem/IRQ days. Amazing such recent history can be cast with that grass-is-always-greener golden hue, but those were some damn good times.
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